Fandemonium

(Ed. Note - Fandemonium is a wild card column that will appear sporadically when applicable. It goes beyond the numbers, beyond, the game, and focuses on the individual characteristics of different fans from around the country.)

This week…

New York Giants Fans vs. New England Patriots Fans

A lot has been made this week about the Boston Herald article last week which claimed that New England fans were far superior in class and social hierarchy than New York fans (not sure why people think Boston fans are snobs). We here at Fandemonium have put together a nice profile cheat sheet (along with nearly every other blog in the NY/NE area) to help you make your own decision.

Fan: Giants Fan

Location: New York, New Jersey, Connecticut, Everyone not from New England this Sunday

Fashion (Faux Pas): Tight, usually stonewashed denim. During the early part of the season, typically in the form of Jorts (jean shorts). It is also not uncommon for the denim to be worn in jacket form or to be accompanied by a mustache. Some residual early 90’s red and blue Zubaz with matching Starter jacket are still found in some circles. It is also not uncommon, when closing in on proximity to Giants Stadium, to notice simultaneous increases of slick-backs, gold jewelry, and neck size. More casual, upscale G-Men fans can be found at their favorite local Jersey Shore watering hole rocking the Bill Parcells’ Giants sweater over a Polo shirt.

Moment They Never Shut-up About: The Simms and LT-led dominance of the 1986 team.

Moment That Makes Them Cringe: The thought of Dave Brown as Phil Simms’ successor; followed closely by the drubbing received at the hands of the Ravens in Superbowl XXXV.

Stereotypical Pre-Game Ritual: Crushing a nice big slice of famous New York Hoboken ‘Zza while listening to “No Surrender” by The Boss and creating a lot of commotion discussing their favorite Sopranos’ moments. (Please note that Bon Jovi’s “Bad Medicine” can also be substituted depending on the total perm height of the women in the group. Perms totaling greater than 22 inches in curl may listen to JBJ.)

Common Misconception: All Giants fans look like this:

Fan: Patriots Fan

Location: Million Dollar Estates in Massachusetts, Connecticut, Rhode Island, Maine, Vermont, New Hampshire

Fashion (Faux Pas): Most gentlemen attend the games in full suits, while the ladies typically wear cocktail dresses. The remainder attended in lumberjack costumes and beards.

Moment They Never Shut-up About: The Sawcks coming back from 3 games to none down to beat…wait…Larry Legend stealing the inbound pass…wait…Tom Br…Not fair that the Bruins are Boston’s stepchild.

Moments That Makes Them Cringe: The flowing, lustrous brown hair of Brett Favre blowing in the wind, running down the field after tossing a long touchdown pass vs. the Pats in Superbowl XXXI.

It is also tear jerking for them to talk about Tony Eason as well as the recent U.S. yachting struggles in the America’s Cup.

Stereotypical Pre-Game Ritual: Enjoying a savory bowl of lobster bisque served in silver plated bowls, while the young folk listen to their favorite Guster album and the olde fans enjoy “The Barber of Seville” while discussing the irony of critical thinking discussed by Tocqueville. The lumberjacks, on the other hand, slug back pre-game cocktails of Sam Adams and maple syrup.

Common Misconception: That they are all Mass-holes.